All they had to do to obtain the victory was follow God’s instructions exactly. If they had only walked around 6 times or put the soldiers first instead of the singers, they would have been defeated.

God had specifically told them not to take anything personal from Jericho. This first city was to be His and He gave them exact instructions as to what to do with the bounty. It didn’t matter if His instructions made sense to them; they were just expected to obey.

Achan saw all the rich bounty and thought maybe he could get away with a few things and hide them in his tent. After all, who would notice when there was so much bounty. It was probably pretty easy to stuff them under his shirt or hide them easily with all the people concentrated on getting everything out.

Nobody obviously noticed that he took anything for himself, but the most important person – GOD – saw him. Then the whole tribe had to suffer a terrible and humiliating defeat at a small place called Ai. I’m sure that was an awful thing to endure after their glowing victory only a few days earlier. This small place should have been very easy to conquer after the hugely fortified walled city of Jericho.

As Joshua sought God about their miserable defeat, the truth began to come to light and desperate measures had to be taken to get the Israelites back into fellowship with God. He had told them specifically before they went into battle that the city of Jericho was “accursed” (doomed or dedicated for destruction) and that if they did not keep themselves from the “accursed” thing they would become “accursed” themselves.

Achan had already been told there would be consequences for his actions, but undoubtedly he thought he would be exempt from them or would never get caught.

The Israelite troubles actually began before they went into battle the next time, but it didn’t show up until they had resoundingly lost what should have been an extremely easy battle.

Joshua 7: 1 says “But the children of Israel committed a trespass in the accursed thing: for Achan… took of the accursed thing: and the anger of the Lord was kindled against the children of Israel.”

God would no longer be with them until they got rid of the accursed things, so they had to take drastic measures to be right with Him again.

Achan and his family paid the ultimate price for disobeying God. He took a beautiful garment, 200 shekels of silver, and a wedge of gold of 50 shekels weight. Those are small things compared to the extreme price he had to pay in the end. PLUS his sin not only affected him, but every member of his family had to pay the ultimate price.

All Satan wants is for you to give him a very small opening and he will keep poking and prodding until he has enlarged it enough to form a huge stronghold to hide behind. He wants to make it as large and strong as possible so that it will take much time and effort for you to get rid of. He knows that if he can do this many people will just give up and accept the consequences, thinking it is much too hard to tear down the stronghold.

We now look at Joshua 8: 1-8 and see that God truly does give second chances when we get rid of our pride and do whatever it takes to get rid of our sin. The Israelites were able to take the city of Ai easily with God working supernaturally on their behalf.

Have you thought you could handle things on your own and messed everything up terribly?

Israel messed up and lost the battle with the little city of Ai. They thought they could do it on their own and found out the hard way they couldn’t.

God never wants any man to take the glory that is His, but He wants you to live your life in such a way that you are willing to walk in obedience to whatever it is He wants you to do.

He wants to work in a supernatural way in your everyday life to do things that only He can ever get the credit for. You may have done some bad things, but His mercy and grace are so astounding that He truly wants to take your messes and turn them into awesome victories for His Kingdom.

You are greatly loved and uniquely special to the LIVING GOD and He truly does have BIG plans for your life.
NEVER give Satan even the slightest opening to cause havoc and destruction in your life or the life of your family. As soon as you realize you have gotten off track, immediately swallow your pride and repent before God.

Satan will put every excuse in your mind as to why you should not repent. Some of the ones I have faced are:

Wait until a better time
Everyone will think you are weak
People will make fun of you or talk behind your back
…And the list goes on and on

Satan will do anything to keep you from having a close relationship with God. He doesn’t mind if you believe in God – even if you radically believe in God. He just doesn’t want you to live your life in a way that you can be USED by God.

If you already have a huge stronghold, it is not too late to start tearing it down. The Holy Spirit can give you direction and guidance as to how to get started and keep at it until you have the victory.

Don’t let Satan win even one more day. If there is anything standing between you and God get on your face, get forgiveness, and start in a new direction.

I can tell you with certainty that Satan won’t like it a bit, but you don’t have to let him win any longer. Choose obedience to God over everything else and let Him give you victory over any area where Satan has gained control.

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1. Has God called lately but you have been too busy to answer?

The schoolmaster, not fluent in English, asked the local priest if he knew
the meaning of WC. Together they pondered possible meanings of the letters
and concluded that the lady wanted to know if there was a Wayside Chapel
near the house…a bathroom never entered their minds. So the schoolmaster
wrote the following reply:

Dear Madam,

I take great pleasure in informing you that the WC is located 9 miles from
the house. It is located in the middle of a grove of pine trees, surrounded
by lovely grounds. It is capable of holding 229 people and is open on
Sundays and Thursdays. As there are many people expected in the summer
months, I suggest you arrive early. There is, however, plenty of standing
room. This is an unfortunate situation, especially if you are in the habit
of going regularly.

It may be of some interest to you that my daughter was married in the WC as
it was there that she met her husband. It was a wonderful event. There were
10 people in every seat. It was wonderful to see the expressions on their
faces. My wife, sadly, has been ill and unable to go recently. It has been
almost a year since she went last, which pains her greatly.

You will be pleased to know that many people bring their lunch and make a
day of it. Others prefer to wait till the last minute and arrive just in
time! I would recommend your ladyship plan to go on a Thursday as there is
organ accompaniment. The acoustics are excellent and even the most delicate
sounds can be heard everywhere. The newest addition is a bell, which rings
every time a person enters.  We are holding a bazaar to provide plush seats
for all since many feel it is long needed.

I look forward to escorting you there myself and seating you in a place
where you can be seen by all.

Sincerely,
Schoolmaster

Check out my other sites:

Handbook for Victorious Christian Living – practical ways to learn to live a victorious Christian life

Blueprint for Victorious Christian Living

Power of the Living Word

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1. Another Funny Story!
2. A Funny Hitchhiking Story
3. A funny "first kiss" story!

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A lady died in January, and Citibank billed her for February & March for their annual service charges on her credit card, and then added late fees & interest on the monthly charge. The balance had been $0.00, now it’s somewhere around $60.00.

A family member placed a call to Citibank:

Family Member: “I’m calling to tell you that she died in January.”

Citibank: “The account was never closed and the late fees & charges still apply.”

Family Member: “Maybe you should turn it over to collections.”

Citibank: “Since it is two months past due, it already has been.”

Family Member: “So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?”

Citibank: “Either report her account to the frauds division or report her to the credit bureau; maybe both!”

Family Member: “Do you think God will be mad at her?”

Citibank: “Excuse me?”

Family Member: “Did you just get what I was telling you . . . the part about her being dead?”

Citibank: “Sir, you’ll have to speak to my supervisor”

Supervisor gets on the phone.

Family Member: “I’m calling to tell you she died in January.”

Citibank: “The account was never closed and the late fees & charges still apply.”

Family Member: “You mean you want to collect from her estate?”

Citibank: (stammer) “Are you her lawyer?”

Family Member: “No, I’m her great nephew.” (lawyer info given)

Citibank: “Could you fax us a certificate of death?”

Family Member: “Sure.” (the fax number is given)

After they get the fax …

Citibank: “Our system just isn’t setup for death. I don’t know what more I can do to help.”

Family Member: “Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep billing her. I don’t think she will care.”

Citibank: “Well, the late fees & charges do still apply.”

Family Member: “Would you like her new billing address?”

Citibank: “That might help.”

Family Member: “Odessa Memorial Cemetery, Highway 129, Plot Number 69.”

Citibank: “Sir, that’s a cemetery!”

Family Member: “What do you do with dead people on your planet?”

Check out my other sites:

Handbook for Victorious Christian Living - practical ways to learn to live a victorious Christian life

Blueprint for Victorious Christian Living

Power of the Living Word

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Power of the Living Word

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****************************************************************************

TWELVE REASONS WHY I STOPPED ATTENDING SPORTS EVENTS

~ Every time I went, they asked me for money.

~ The people with whom I had to sit by didn’t seem very friendly.

~ The seats were too hard and not comfortable at all.

~ The coach never came to call on me.

~ The referee made a decision with which I could not agree.

~ I was sitting with some hypocrites — they came only to see what others were wearing.

~ Some games went into overtime, and I was late getting home.

~ The band played some numbers that I had never heard before.

~ The games are scheduled when I want to do other things.

~ My parents took me to too many games when I was growing up.

~ Since I read a book on sports, I feel that I know more than the coaches anyhow.

~ I don’t want to take my children, because I want them to choose for themselves what sport they like best.

Check out my other sites:

Handbook for Victorious Christian Living – practical ways to learn to live a victorious Christian life

Blueprint for Victorious Christian Living

Power of the Living Word

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Noah’s Ark

Ending his sermon, a preacher announced that he would preach on Noah and the Ark on the following Sunday, and gave the scriptural reference for the congregation to read ahead of time.

A couple of boys noticed something interesting about the placement of the story in the Bible. They slipped into the church and glued two pages of the pulpit Bible together.

The next Sunday, the preacher got up to read his text. “Noah took unto himself a wife,” he began, “and she was” – he turned the page to continue – “three hundred cubits long, fifty wide and thirty high.”

Check out my other sites:

Handbook for Victorious Christian Living – Practical ways to learn to live a victorious Christian life

Blueprint for Victorious Christian Living

Power of the Living Word

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The boss wondered why one of his most valued employees had not phoned in sick one day. Having an urgent problem with one of the main computers, he dialed the employee’s home phone # and was greeted with a child’s whisper

“Hello”

Is your daddy home? he asked.

“Yes.” whispered the small voice.

May I talk with him?

The child whispered, “no.”

Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, “Is your mommy there?”
“Yes.”

May I talk with her?

Again the small voice whispered, “No.”

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the asked, “Is anybody else there?”

“Yes” whispered the child, “A policeman !!”

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee’s home, the boss asked, “May I speak with the policeman?”

“No, he’s busy.” whispered the child.

“Busy doing what?”

“Talking to daddy and mommy and the fireman,” came the whispered answer.

Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise in the background through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, “What is that noise?”

“A helicopter.” answered the whispering voice.

“What is going on there?” demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive.

Again, whispering, the child answered, “The search team just landed.”

Alarmed, concerned and a little frustrated the boss asked, “What are they searching for?”

Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle……..

“ME !”

***************************************************************

Check out my other sites:

Handbook for Victorious Christian Living – Practical ways to learn to live a victorious Christian life

Blueprint for Victorious Christian Living

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23RD PSALM FOR THE WORKPLACE

The Lord is my real boss and I shall not want.

He gives me peace, when chaos is all around me.

He gently reminds me to pray before I speak and to do all things without murmuring and complaining.

He reminds me that He is my Source and not my job.

He restores my sanity every day and guides my decisions that I might honor Him in everything I do.

Even though I face absurd amounts of emails, system crashes, unrealistic deadlines, budget cutbacks, gossiping

co-workers, discriminating supervisors, and an aging body that doesn’t cooperate every morning, I will not

stop–for He is with me!

His presence, His peace, and His power will see me through.

He raises me up, even when they fail to promote me.

He claims me as His own, even when the company threatens to let me go.

His faithfulness and love are better than any bonus check.

His retirement plan beats every 401K there is.

When it’s all said and done, I’ll be working for Him a whole lot longer and for that, I bless His Name.

(from Mikey’s Funnies)

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Check out my other sites:

Handbook for Victorious Christian Living – Practical ways to learn to live a victorious Christian life

Blueprint for Victorious Christian Living

Power of the Living Word

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AN  “AD”  FUNNY

The following is an ad from a newspaper that appeared four days in a row – the last three hopelessly trying to correct the first day’s mistake.

MONDAY:

For sale: R.D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Phone 948-0707 after 7 P.M.. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him cheap.

TUESDAY:

Notice: We regret having erred In R.D. Jones’ ad yesterday. It should have read “One sewing machine for sale cheap. Phone 948-0707 and ask for Mrs. Kelly, who lives with him after 7 P.M.”

WEDNESDAY:

Notice: R.D. Jones has informed us that he has received several annoying telephone calls because of the error we made in the classified ad yesterday. The ad stands correct as follows: “For sale — R.D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Cheap. Phone 948-0707 after 7 P.M. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who loves with him.”

THURSDAY:

Notice: I, R.D. Jones, have no sewing machine for sale. I intentionally broke it. Don’t call 948-0707 as I have had the phone disconnected. I have not been carrying on with Mrs. Kelly. Until yesterday she was my housekeeper, but she has now quit.

Check out my other sites:

Handbook for Victorious Christian Living - Practical ways to learn to live a victorious Christian life

Blueprint for Victorious Christian Living

Power of the Living Word

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